There seems to have been a gap in broadcasts!!!

Well folks it seem to have been a while since I last spoke to you. My wife and I have been away on a 29 day cruise around the parts of Southern Europe and the Balkans then crossing the Atlantic to Florida. I wrote blogs and tried to email them from the boat, but as yet only the first one has arrived and that was today.

The best laid plans of mice and men....it did not work. My role as an international correspondent was not entirely successful. Well in fact not at all!



All that remains is to wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas and Holiday season and I will start again just before the New Year!

Suspension of Blogs until after Christmas

Hi all, I am away on a holiday and the internet is spotty at best. So there will be no blogs posted here until after Christmas. Thanks for your understanding.

Many thanks,
Paul

The gift of anticpation

We are going on a trip to Europe for 5 weeks leaving this Thursday coming. I must say we have done a fair bit of travelling over the years and most of the time I just turn up on the day and go. Obviously I pack and do all those kinds of things but I don't usually anticipate ahead.

This time however I have made the effort of join my wife as an anticipator of things to come. This is not without risk I must say because you take the risk of being disappointed if it doesn't fulfil your expectations. I have decided this time I am just going to jump in with both feet. It certainly feels like we are closer together as we leave.

We have planned, plotted, chosen and experienced all that is on offer before we have left. So we have indeed maxed out the experience thus. far. I used to think I was living "in the day" but I think I have gained in anticipating this experience even in living each day ....one day at a time.

Anticipating has proven to be a gift I wasn't expecting. it has set a gateway to the trip that I have never head

Bev has just told me ....................................It's three days to take off.......................magic!

Next week I will be reporting in from London or Venice, two places I love. Bucket list things happening soon!! Watch this space.

Never too old to learn

I was on Church set up yesterday. Our church takes place in a local community centre that has multiple users both in the week and weekend. So we must set up the main community hall meet to our requirements each week. That involves make sure the kitchen is prepared and everything is ready for the service. One of the tasks is putting out the chairs ready for the service. Now you think that maybe a fairly basic task, just set them and follow the church pattern and to a certain extent that is true.

There are however some ways of approaching this that are better than others. The task of setting out chairs requires us to move the chairs in stacks of six from a storage area to the main auditorium. Now I have usually moved from the chairs closest to the front first and worked my way back, fairly straight forward. Now yesterday I was working with a couple that own and manage a funeral home and have to move chairs around a lot. I was busy in the kitchen when I came to do the chairs they were well into moving them. Rather than moving from front to back they were moving from right to left. The space on the right was actually much more open as opened out into another storage part. As I looked I realised how much more efficient their method was for both putting them out and returning them.

It dawned on me that no matter how often you have done something you can always see a better way either from someone else or a good idea of you own! You are never too old or too experienced to learn a better way! It’s not we are too old, we just stop trying to learn. Look for a new way to do something this week.

Why.....Indeed

As a life coach, I was trained not to use the word “why” in my questioning techniques. This is ostensibly because when you use it with other people it implies some form of judgement. That you are questioning that persons decision. It can often be construed as a negative.

I was thinking about this recently. I came to the conclusion that the word "why" is a very powerful in our own personal repertoire for exactly the same reason. It implies judgement, it forces us to look at our decisions. Why would chose to do that? Or conversely why would we decide not to do that?

I have made a couple of decisions using this technique recently. When I have been looking carefully at a decision. In the end I did not make the decision I normally would have expected, but I am very content with my choices. I believe I made a better choice by critically asking the question Why would I do this or conversely why would I not do this?

Add “why” to your personal decision making repertoire; it forces you reconsider and make judgement before making a final decision.

Simple but effective.

Just STOPP!

You know sometimes you see something and you think wow this is great.

Well I was walking through my wife's office and I saw this small card about the size of a credit card with STOPP written on it well I thought that's unusual or misspelt, one of the two. So I stopped to read it and thought this is awesome, I need to share this!

You have heard of hatching or snatching an idea......................... well this is a snatch!

So here goes: These are a set of steps to use when life throws you a curve ball.

1. Stop
2. Take a breath
3. Observe: What am I thinking? What am I reacting to? What am I feeling in my body?
4. Pull Back: Put in some perspective. See the bigger picture. Is this fact or opinion? How would someone else see this?
5. Practice what works: What is the best thing to do for me, for others, for this situation?

A simple but a great intervention, Give it a try next time your not sure what to do.

You do have time! Go smarter not necessarily faster!

A dangerous pastime for some!

 

 

I am at heart a procrastinator…….. I may be somewhat of a reformed procrastinator, when my will dominates my very easy going nature. Which basically says "why do today what you can put off till tomorrow." So I have learned to be disciplined and get things done over time, but it certainly does not come naturally.

 

 My observation is that the very thing that we think is going to save us from our procrastination just provides a further smoke screen. I am referring to planning and goal setting. You may say well if you only planned when you are going to get things done your problem would be over!

Not so unfortunately for some it can give a false sense of achievement. We emotionally feel like we have actually done the job when we have only planned to do it. The real achievement is actually in completing the task not just planning it! So I have learnt to go past the good feeling of planning and actually just do it! I do not deny procrastinators need to plan and goal set like everybody else but they  must also complete the task! This provides honest and real sense of achievement not just an emotional high!

 

Sometimes you just have to bite the bullet!

The Panoramic View

I started to think about my 2017 and what that might look like using the brainstorming method. I worked out the categories and activities I wanted to give attention to over the coming year.
Deciding:

• What that might look.
• What preparation that might need from me before 2017.

As I sat back and pondered that process I decided that I also need to take a longer term view. This  may be partly because of my age, as I am acutely aware I am not getting any younger. I want to make sure that my time counts for something in the coming years. I guess I am starting to think "legacy", what will I leave behind? What did I exchange my life for?

London Panorama

I decided I needed to think bigger! Take a panoramic view if you will.  Starting to say where do I want to be in 5 years time? What do I want to be doing? What might I have achieved?

So I decided to take each of those major categories and extend out my goals in broad terms towards 2021. Where do I see myself in 2021 as far as career, family, recreation, and yes, health because the decisions I make today will influence my health in the coming years about diet and fitness. I have just lost 7Kg in weight I have a little more to go. However if I do not change my life style I will gradually lose all that I have gained. I know because I have done it before! I must enjoy my success absolutely! Then make a plan to maintain that desired weight level. As the blog title says I must be intentional!


So where do you want to be in 2021?  If you are not sure, it is worth some thought. I know I am starting to pay more attention to living intentionally not just drifting from one year to the next with short term to planning. I have done it all my life bounced over here and then moved over there with what should be happening.. I need to focus on what my long term goals are to see things achieved.


Things that matter!!

Until next time.
Paul

2017 in Macro

As I started to share last week I am planning for 2017. So I am going to share the process I am using with you. Hopefully it will help as you look at 2017 for yourself. As with painting or writing sometimes we just need the big themes or ideas down on paper.

A mind map if you will:

• What are the ideas, categories, streams of interest I need to cover?
• What do I need to develop?
• What do I need to add to the list that was not there this year?
• What things or areas need to go?
• What are the important categories?....................................Significant Other, Family, Employment or Career, Recreation/Hobbies, Faith, Learning and Personal Development and whatever else may fit.
• You may also choose to be a little more specific in some areas say in "recreation" and hobbies you may come down to Holidays, sports, a specific hobby or daily fitness. Whatever fits for you.

A Mind Map is a Graphic Organiser which simply allows you get your thoughts down in categories, in a visual way that you can understand . Hence the term graphic means visual. For us older bodies it may be new, but it is very common in modern schooling to help children organise their thinking. So that is the object of our exercise to organise our thoughts quickly and succinctly with few boundaries. You just keep adding more layers from our 2017 centre.

Give it a go you never know where you will end up!

2017 is just around the corner!

In line with the Ritchie McCaw movie last week I was thinking about how our plans don't always work out the way we expect. I would say it is quite rare for things to go as planned. There is always a need to reassess where we are, and from that there may be a need  make new decisions, to modify our thoughts, to reposition ourselves for further action. But.....................how often are we able to do that?

I think a lot of our difficulty comes for the fact that we often act first then decide we need a plan. When we are impulsive it leaves us vulnerable because we simply have not considered all of the possibilities we face. It sounded like a good idea at the time!! Even when we plan our planning often only covers the areas we want to consider, not taking areas of risk into account.

I know come next year I will need to have some plans in place for what I think 2017 could  bring. It is so easy to drift along even if we have a vague sort of idea about where I think I could end up or what I want to do. Because everything is a little bit vague it is so much easier to just give up because we don't really know what is working and what is not. A destination point is not a plan it is at best an itinerary and unless it shows detail on the way not even a good one of those.

This is all very counter cultural to my nature, I am a BIG Picture thinker. I get the idea of destination but not always the concept of the detail of how this might happen. So for me I need to put into practice all that I know about planning.  Coming up with some staged plans that will allow me to actually stand a reasonable chance of seeing that which I have a vision for coming to fruition. It is far to easy for me just decide it is not working and QUIT! Changing direction because I feel I am not getting where I want to go. I need some basic and simple planning using S.M.A.R.T goals that will allow me to step forward into 2017 with some confidence. Now is the time to plan for 2017, not January 1st, it is all a bit late by then, at that stage you only end up 10 months to work with, not 12!

Most of us don't fail we just QUIT!

If we don't have a plan how can we make new decisions, modify our thoughts, reposition ourselves for further action.

Looking for change in 2017! It is time for us to do some "Intentional Living". We are going to plan together!

Until next time and some S.M.A.R.T goals!

Paul

It's all in your head!

I recently went to see the movie "Chasing Great" the story of Richie McCaw the ex -All Black captain in the year leading up to the second winning of the Rugby World Cup in 2015.

The part that interested me was about the journey in the mind towards the winning of both world Cups. The difference between the All Blacks last two campaigns in the World Cup compared to the previous three. Where they failed was their mental strength and preparation. Ritchie McCaw in particular examined carefully the mental preparation that had gone into the previous campaigns or should I say the lack of it. He reasoned that these teams were as physically prepared as they could be and they had a skill base the equal if not better than their opponents yet they still failed. Therefore there had to another factor and it had to be their mental preparation.

He and the team then went through a process of mental preparation that ensured that they were as mentally well prepared as they were physically . Their back to back World Cups prove the point that this was effective.

I began to think how many times we not do as well as we could simply because we are mentally under prepared for the position we find ourselves in. How do we cope when we are faced with the unexpected the occurrence, the thing that doesn't our way. What do we do with this type of occurrence? Conversely what do when we succeed beyond our wildest dreams. How do we cope? Developing our mental and emotional strength maybe the difference between success and failure, between average and outstanding.

                                          

                                           The battle is won first and foremost in the mind

Can we solve "Catch 22"?

Over the last little while I have been thinking about recreation time. What might that look like? Does it have to be a sport, a project or a hobby. What is recreation anyway?

 I like to think of it as Re.....Creation something that builds me , gives me life.

So I began to think, my nature is to love to sit and read a book for hours or use the model trains I have to do shunting puzzles. Is this realistic however, to actually think that I might have hours to do those wonderfully relaxing things. If I was completely honest I would have to say no, because nothing else gets done. Therein lies "Catch 22", if I consistently relax and  just do those enjoyable things, then other things; lawns gardens, house maintenance  and washing cars gets behind and  a level of angst sets in. That kind of defeats the purpose.

Now I know that some people are highly energetic in their relaxation pastimes riding, climbing, running but they would seem to have same glitch as the book and the train i.e. nothing else gets done.
So the question is can I get enough enjoyment out of the lawns gardens, house maintenance  and washing cars to call it recreation. I thought I won't know until I try. Now I must admit I did not think the answer was yes. Might be that I am naturally sedentary and like things to relax that don't take a lot of physical exertion. So I didn't like my chances at making this work.

I must after trying some of these things over three weekends in a row I have actually got a lot of satisfaction from these activities. I have done lawns, gardens for three weeks  and washed three cars as this last Sunday afternoon. I must say that I have a great sense of achievement that has given a really good sense of well being, True Re...Creation! I think that it was because I decided to give it a good try not be half hearted, but make a choice to enjoy it if possible.

I think the attitude as I said in  a previous blog makes such a huge difference. The other thing That I did was to read a little and use my trains a little and I finished the weekend feeling content and relaxed. You can't beat a balanced approach.

What brings you life........ can you balance those things out with the chores you have to do?

Good as it maybe ......NO!

I had a list of things to get done today. Most of them were OK things that I did not mind doing. It was going to be a good day. Then I was given an opportunity of another good option to go a great movie! It would have been a great thing to do. However it would mean putting off the things I was doing now and needed to get done. For instance writing this blog for you. I had already prioritised the things I needed to do over other activities before this movie offer.

So here I am, with a number of possibilities

1.  I can go to the movies and not worry about it put off the list things.
2. I can finish the things I needed to get done and not go to the movies.
3. I can finish the things I needed to get done and go to the movies at a later time.
4. I can just prioritise the list and worry about other things another time.

My first choice in the end was Choice #4 because it catered for the need I knew I had to get this stuff done.

 I may end up with Choice #3 later in the week it still is an option
.
Sometimes we have to say NO to good things, even fun things because in the end it will cause more stress than they are worth. I would probably not really enjoy the movie as I should because I know I should being doing my list. When the movie is over I will still have the list to do but with time pressure, because I am 3+ hours behind.Most of the time when I am saying no to good things it is not allowing procrastination to take hold. I am a natural procrastinator, so it is time to engage the brain.
A simple "big person" decision. Just because it is good and fun doesn't always make it the best option.

Hey I will go to the movie Next week!

Are you a procrastinator?

Busy.....just do it and REST!

We live a busy life style and are sometimes overcommitted. So how do we rest in our busyness? I started to think about that this weekend. My wife and I went to Kelly Tarlton's Aquarium with my son, his wife and their three year old. This was going to be part of a busy weekend. I was thinking about the things that we had to do as we went to meet them. It was great to spend time with them and Caitlin (the 3 year old) loved the fish and other marine life. Especially seeing a real life Nemo and Dory. She even managed to go home with a soft toy Nemo.  Now what has being with an excited 3 year old got to with rest you may well ask.

Well it goes like this, as we went round the aquarium, I noticed that as I started to watch the fish I started to relax.  As I understand, it quite a natural response as aquarium owners round the world will testify. However what struck me was that you have to take the moments of rest and relaxation where you find them. So my taking the time to watch the fish while being as present as possible with Caitlin was a winner.

We were having dinner with friends that night. One of the things that needed to be done was to make an ice cream desert cake. We were a little pushed for time, but as I started I just determined to enjoy the process. In that enjoyment I started to rest in the activity. It was not a chore I enjoyed it, becoming recreation and in the end restorative.

I was reminded of the line in Mary Poppins which says this "In every job to done there is an element of fun. find the fun and snap the jobs a game!" If we could live this out, we might just find a key to resting in our busy lives. In the things we have to do..................find the enjoyment where possible, either in the task, the environment or the company!!

Might just ease your load!

Until next time
Paul

Wisdom from the battlefield

7th Cavalry in the la Drang Valley 1965

I was reading a leadership book that discussed a technique pioneered by Lt. Colonel Hal Moore of the 1st Battalion 7th Calvary Regiment in The Vietnam War. Moore won the first major battle between the North Vietnamese army and The United States Army in the la Drang Valley in 1965.

At the time he was criticised for withdrawing within himself at times during the battle. What he was actually doing was asking three basic questions to assess his situation. Because there was a very real possibility that the enemy which completely outnumbered him would completely overrun his troops.

He asked these three things of himself:

1. What is happening?
2. What is not happening?
3. How can I effect what is happening?

These provide the basis for developing strategy which can be applied to your situation. This gives us a framework to look at our situation objectively from all sides. What is happening in the situation. What is not happening that we could have expected. This was the question that I found most powerful because I would tend to move straight from question 1 to question 3. However the lack of certain events or activity will certainly shed light onto what we can do and can't do to effect what is happening.

This is a simple but powerful strategy now used widely in the U.S military. It could work for you too!

Give it a try, I am!

Until next week
Paul

Nike might just be right

I was thinking about my own ability to distract myself  .....................to procrastinate if you will. I seemed to have overcome the ones where I procrastinate on the ones that absolutely have to be done. But I still have the ability to waste time when I have time to waste.

Now that might not seem like a problem I mean I do have the time right! If something seems like it is a while away I just put it on the do list ( that in itself is an improvement!!) Unfortunately its priority level means it has no immediate action necessary. An example of this that I am going to need a visa for the United States in November.  I can get on line, a relatively simple process I would think. So I have put it off because it is simple and not time pressured. So why don't I just do it!

So that is this weeks priority to look at the things "to do" list and complete all those tasks that can be put off. and I have.
I will follow Nike's instruction just do it! I will do them when they come up and I believe I will make my life easier. If you are like me I suggest you do it too!!!

So by next weeks blog I will have my visa in process!

Makes you stop and think!

 Not the original vase but similar

I have a green art deco style vase which belonged to my paternal grandmother. I feel strange connection to her and this vase. I say strange because she was dead 5 years before I was born so I never actually knew her. However I do love that vase!

I was washing the vase out after removing the dead roses out of and I filled it with warm water from the tap. When I first filled, the water that filled it was cloudy with a lot of small bubbles so you couldn't see through it. I tipped it out immediately. I then refilled in the same way and the same thing happened that the vase was filled with cloudy water.  I then placed it down and watched what happened; gradually the water began to clear from the bottom and within a relatively short time the water was clear.

I began to think that we can be like that when are presented with difficulty, we can immediately react and do something. Sometimes there may be a place for that kind of reaction. However the are also times when it is better to wait and when things become clear respond rather than immediately react. I know at times I can react quickly
when a reasoned response would be a better choice. Especially if you are not sure how an event or happening may effect your plans. Then like the vase the correct response will be come clear in time.

I love it when everyday events reinforce life wisdom. Think about it this and take time to respond when you can. I know I do better when I do.

Don't Just Do It...................Do It Well!

We have owned our much loved Volkswagen Golf Cabriolet  for 10 years and she is a little tired at just under 230,000km. After much agonising about a replacement we decided we need to go out and have a look. So what did I do first? Get on the internet of course! In my search had I come a cross a care that seemed interesting a 2009 Toyota Prius. Now being a motor racing buff, I had never ever considered a "hybrid". I mean they are used by those who are first and foremost concerned with environmental or taxi drivers aren't they?

However this was such a well optioned car," top of the line" New Zealand assembled vehicle my wife and I decided to go and have a look. So I rang and for the first time spoke to Allan making an eleven o'clock appointment. We would have to travel for over an hour to get to this appointment in Auckland City. The first thing that happened was that the we were late because we got caught in traffic for our appointment.We had rung the office to say that we would be late as we sat in the traffic When we got there we saw the car that was being climbed all over by another couple of guys. Allan then introduced himself and said he would talk to his boss about us travelling so far and having a prior viewing claim on the car. The manager agreed and said to the other gentlemen that if we did not take the car he would ring them..... most impressive.

Allan the proceeded to spend an amazing amount of time with us. He talked about the car and all its features about it had to offer. More important to me as a Life Coach, he then questioned us about our needs and how was this car going to meet those needs. As couple we were challenged to look at our vehicle needs and to examine our life stage in a way we weren't expecting. We came to realise that the previous car purchase a Mazda Demio had fulfilled the purpose as being very economic which was why we bought it,  but had left us short in people transport capability. We came to see that this would fulfil our potential needs for the next ten years when our life stage would probably change again.

Allan was masterful not in just his sales technique  but in his care for us as a couple. he was constantly checking back in with to ensure we knew that this want we wanted to do, but also this car would meet our lifestyle requirements. Because of the care Allan took the whole sales process took three hours, but to me this was irrelevant. Yes I bought car, but Allan has a repeat customer when the Demio needs replacing I will go and talk to Allan. We sung his praises to anybody in that branch who would listen. The response was always the same "Yes he was the best sales men they had" and more importantly he was a great guy!

Being a car buff I have bought a lot of cars in my time;  family cars, racing/rally cars, sports cars and classic cars. This was the best sales experience I have ever had simply because I am convinced I got it right because Allan made sure that happened! I was convinced the correctness of an option 24hours previously I would not have even considered.

Allan has shown me the absolute value of doing what you do

with excellence. It is not only good for you it means you set the tone for all those around you. This is leadership, not only was he the best, he influenced all those around him. We all have this capacity to influential. Whether we are the president or the janitor. We have the capacity to take pride in what we do and be the best we can.

Thank you Allan for todays experience! A master-class in excellence!

How about you? Do you display excellence?

"I don't wanna!" But......!

We have had our three grandchildren aged 12, 10 and 7 staying with us since last Thursday while their parents went to a conference in another city. We had planned out some activities, which included going to go 10 pin bowling and then meet their 3 year old cousin and uncle at the local council swimming pools for the afternoon. The eldest granddaughter was invited to have a pedicure with Grandma and a girls afternoon. Which  is in the end what she decided to do. That left me with the boys and we were going to go through with our plan for the afternoon.

Just before we were about to go the eldest grandson decided that he didn't want to go, saying he didn't really like bowling. We said "that is fine but are not spending the day watching TV or other screen time." With those restrictions, he decided to come with his brother. He really tried hard and participated in everything. The smiles started to develop and the laughter.

On the way home I asked if he had enjoyed the afternoon and he said he had a great time. So I stated to think when did he start to enjoy it.? I believe he started to enjoy it, when he first started to engaged with the process around him. He found bits of the bowling he did enjoy, little bits of success. Then he loved the pools.

So much of our time can be wasted with things we don't like and as a consequence won't engage with. If we would just engage with the process we may find a different result to one we expect.

We may enjoy at least part of the experience, or maybe learn some new skill that makes it a little better.

I believe there is a lesson in just choosing to engage enthusiastically whenever we can.

The option-tunity of legacy

In todays world there are many opportunities for a lot of us. There seems to be a huge range of choices of what we could do with our life. What do we want to do with our education, our recreation, our career, our personal life, our relationships and family? A veritable smorgasbord choice in so many areas. Some would regard me as old, I may prefer deep into middle age, but even I have choices going forward. How will I choose to live the rest of my life?

I have heard of a strategy described as living with the end in mind. Some would say designing your own epitaph. What kind of legacy do you want leave behind. What will people who know you, know of you or have interactions with you, remember you for or by? In other words what sort of inheritance do you want to leave when you are no longer alive?

I believe whether you are 9 or 99 you always have a choice to learn and develop. You still have the opportunity to change what will happen or rectify what has happened. The choice or option is yours.

I believe it starts with self discovery: 

Who am I? What do I believe?  What are my values?What do I want? Who am I connected to? Who could I be connected to? Who do I want to be connected to?

What am I good at? What gifts and talents do I have? What options can I develop? What experience do I already have? What training or educational options is available?


Where Do I want To be in 5 years or 10 years? Where do I want to be emotionally, relationally financially and physically?  What opportunities would I desire after that period of time.

As I ponder these questions, I encourage you to also do so. Lets call it a life health check.

A cautionary note!

Post storm wisdom.

Last night there was a major storm over our little town and throughout our region. So many people are talking about it on social networks and in conversations with people. Everybody that I have spoken to this morning has talked about the weather.

Apparently there was torrential rain, thunder and lightning. I say apparently, because I slept through the the whole thing. The only insight I had that anything had taken place was the slips on the road and the bits of debris around. when I drove out at about 6.30am.

Now I can get involved in the talk and the discussion but in reality it was not mine to talk about because I simply just didn't experience it. As a spectator it is interesting I suppose, however I do not need to get involved. The descriptions of others may be interesting, but I have a choice to jump on board with all the discussions or let it float on by.

I started to think that we are presented with a lot of situations each day that really have nothing to do with us. Situations that produce drama that don't have any direct relation to us and we cannot positively effect. I am not suggesting we should not get involved good causes, but there are other situations which are just hype.

Later on I had an opportunity to enter into a discussion about an issue at work which really had nothing to do with me. I could of jumped in on the drama, but I had nothing positive to offer, nothing that would improve the situation. So I choose to stay out, like the storm discussion it simply wasn't mine to be involved in.

Wisdom often comes quietly and in a simple form.

.

.

Social Media?

I was reading  a report on social media use which I found quite interesting, if not a little scary:

 

Specifically, among American social network users: (As at 2013)

• 18-34-year-olds report spending 3.8 hours a day;
• 35-49-year-olds report spending 3 hours per day; and
• 50-64-year-olds report spending 2.4 hours per day.
• In terms of the gender difference, female social networkers spend almost 40% more time daily with social media sites than men (3.6 hours vs. 2.6 hours), a finding consistent with earlier research from MyLife and from Burst Media showing women to be more active than men on social media.
• Interestingly internationally there are a lot of countries that have much higher use of social networks than the United States.

I also found it interesting that the average American only gets 6.8 hours sleep. (This is a significant drop from 7.9 hours in 1942.) The reason I was interested in that was to see how much of their waking hours were occupied by social media. So the average American is a awake 17.2 hours. So at the lower levels of use they are exchanging around 15-20% of their awake time to this phenomena in very rough terms.

Interestingly I don't consider myself  a particularly heavy social media user. I did start thinking how much of my life is this phenomena occupying, because of responding to the "Oh that looks a bit interesting  I will go and have a look.'' attention getter.

I decided to ask myself a few questions:

Is my life any better for this activity?   The  answer; probably not. 

Do I feel any better socially connected than before? The  answer; A little through Facebook. But there is really no  major depth. Anything that is really meaningful  still happens face to face.

Do I waste time? The  answer; yes especially on Trade Me (A New Zealand online auction site like E-Bay)

If I am honest do I have a problem with it at present? The  answer; probably not but I need to be aware and monitor my use.

I need to live intentionally in this area and continue to monitor where I sit. Because at the moment I don't have time to access much. However when I do get time I tend to use more time than I need to.

 I do however get benefits, after all I am still talking to you on social media

How about how you?

How do you go with the questions?

Until next week, Paul 

Micro to Macro - "Joining the Dots'

I was have a conversation with a friend of mine about some of the things that have happened in her life recently. A number of things had been challenging for her  and she was busy analysing what had happed in each case. What and how effected it had had on her and what she could do about it. I sat and listened for a while quietly.

I then asked these simple questions; How are these things linked? I then asked, What was is similar about each situation?

That really revolutionised her thought, she began to see links. Differences, but also similar causes and characteristics. "Wow" she said "All this stuff has the same basic pattern."

There are times when is beneficial to step back to get the macro view because it allows you to see patterns that may be masked in the up close viewpoint. The next question I asked was what can you do with this information? The solutions then started to develop with the revelation of the connections.

Are there issues in your life where stepping back and gaining a wider view may be a key to moving forward.

Have an awesome week.
Paul

Viva la France

I must admit I had become a little disappointed by the numbers who had read my blogs in the last couple of weeks. There has seemed to be a downward trend, considering they take such a lot of thought and time to write.

I was beginning to wonder what I was going to write about this week. Then I noticed that I had 7 new readers from France. I had never had any French readers before, as far as I can remember. I found this quite encouraging, it gave me  a lift in my thinking and emotions. The other point about them was they had found the blog without Facebook which was also encouraging.

It occurred to me that we become disappointed and discouraged on occasions because we don't look for something to lift our spirits. In itself there is nothing that miraculous about 7 new French readers, but by allowing it to lift me, I was maintaining my own balance. That allowed me to go on to notice that in this week alone people from six nations read this blog!

You can too look around you, there is encouragement everywhere. You  just have to see it. Start small, you never know where it could take you. Often it is all in the way you look at it. Is the  glass half  full or half empty?

Until next week. Even if the glass is only half full, it seems a better option.

IQ of a washing machine?

I was sitting listening to the washing machine spinning away during it's cycle. That started me thinking about how it gets out of balance. I mean you can put a load of washing on very carefully spreading everything in the machine,  trying make sure there is good weight distribution. Strangely, sometimes the clothes and other articles absorb more water than we expect or it could be the agitation in the washing action........ Then the whole load becomes out of balance. As the suspension in the machine can't cope with the unequal weight distribution, the spin cycle cuts out.Including alarm noises as well!!

Modern machines have, as the illustration shows  have bump detection system which allows the machine to cut itself out if it gets too far out of balance. I started to think wouldn't that be great if we had as much sense as the washing machine. To stop and sit down and take stock when things are not going as well as we hoped. How often do we plan our day so carefully, with much more care than we take care in loading our washing machine.  Then there may be too much agitation in our day!  Or just didn't quite figure out the weight of certain items. However unfortunately when things get out of whack, often we just try and push through. We don't stop and reassess where we are, even when the alarm goes off.  Then redistribute our days load accordingly, giving us more chance of success.

I marvel at myself sometimes that I don't have the IQ of a washing machine. Maybe I should look at my washing machine with new admiration. It knows when to say enough!

How about you?

Till next week Paul

10% Inspiration and.......................

Inspiration is an interesting commodity in todays world. There is a great deal of emphasis placed on things that inspire us or people that inspire us. We have quotes flying all over the internet of things that people have said that are supposed to inspire and encourage us.

This week I have had a few things described to me as inspirational. So I started to think about what is inspirational? After some thought I feel that inspiration is like the ignition system in a car it gets the car started, but it is not what in the end will drive it forward.

I am more inclined towards the concept that greatness is achieved by 10% inspiration and 90% perspiration. Many things are  started (inspiration), but few are followed through to completion perspiration. My job is to take inspiration and work with it to see something worthwhile develop.

Here are some definitions that might help:

inspiration (n.) 

c. 1300, "immediate influence of God or a god," especially that under which the holy books were written, from Old French inspiracion "inhaling, breathing in; inspiration" (13c.), from Late Latin inspirationem (nominative inspiratio), noun of action from past participle stem of Latin inspirare "blow into, breathe upon," figuratively "inspire, excite, inflame," from in- "in" (see in- (2)) + spirare "to breathe" (see spirit (n.)).

Another set of definitions which fit in with modern culture

1. A person, object, or situation which quickens or stimulates an influence upon the intellect, emotions or creativity.  
2. A new idea, especially one which arises suddenly and is clever or creative.  [

I would accept all of these definitions as part of my values system. I do believe in "divine breath." I also believe that people under that influence can be inspirational to me.

So who inspires me:
I will start with a couple historical figures and the reason why?

Winston Churchill has always inspired me given that I am a Baby Boomer born after World War 2 and during the Cold War. Brought up on Commando war comics and having a great love for English history. Why do I admire Churchill? Firstly he had an unshakeable sense of destiny; he knew no matter what his life looked like,  he was created for a purpose and greatness. He became a symbol of the character of a generation that overcame huge odds to triumph .Another point for me is he did his best work in his 60's being 71 at the end of the war.( I must be getting older)



Martin Luther King Jnr was a leader in a different generation leading for a different reason.. His cause was social justice. Martin Luther King Jnr came  as a man of peace, with great courage he stood against violence and corruption to see his  dream achieved. He did not live to see the full effect of what he set out to achieve. It is still unfolding!

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I think that one of the things that inspires me about both King and Churchill was that they were not perfect saints. They had  some spectacular character flaws but still achieved their purpose in their generation.

Rachel Joy Scott was actually incredibly young, but still achieved her purpose in her generation. a victim of the Columbine massacre on April 20 1999 in Colorado in the United States. She was able to work on a small scale of an every day high school student but still inspire a generation of her peers. It encourages me that we may never know how or what we will do will effect others; walking our everyday journey.
She walked to a different drum beat and that made all the difference. If you don't know who she is look for the book called "Rachel's Tears"


Whether we perform on the macro or micro stage we can still have a profound influence on those around us .

The next two inspirational people are so special because I walk with them on a daily and weekly basis.

Colin Shilston is a man of honour and integrity I have walked with for 18 years. I have privilege of journeying with him through the good, the bad and sometimes the down right ugly. He is a rare commodity in this day and age "authentic man". Above all he is a man of courage to stand for what he believes when to it is not popular, acknowledge when he gets it wrong, and last but not least, give his utmost for God's highest in this generation.

I will continue to be inspired by this man and consider it an absolute honour to know him.

I have saved the best till last. The person I am going to acknowledge is my beautiful wife of 30 years Bev. This wonderful women has been my companion for 30+ years. I watched her walk through  the difficult places with integrity and courage. She has done things in that should not have been able to be done but she has achieved them anyway. She is starting to see the fruits of her labours, while still dealing with the curve balls that life throws at her. I am so privileged and inspired to journey with you truly do do encapsulate the 10% inspiration and 90% perspiration. The quiet achiever! my love you inspire me everyday!

Who inspires you? But most importantly why?